“I lived there. At the Palace of Versailles.”

I didn’t know whether or not to believe him. Dad was, after all, eighty-two, with a touch of dementia.

“I was an intelligence officer serving with General Eisenhower during World War II. My unit lived in the petite écurie, or small stable.”

With one flash of disclosure, my vision of my father shifted. The man who was a wizard with numbers and sequences, who had a passion for detail and who could see patterns from the inside-out had served as an intelligence officer. One sentence and fact gave me a new understanding of my dad — a World War II hero who I suddenly saw with new eyes.

Opening Doors to Understanding
The events in our past are the key that provides significance for our present and future. Our memories show us who we are and bring shape, focus, and purpose to our lives.

Reminiscing tells us where we fit into the master narrative of life and what our existence means. When we reminisce, we draw meaning from the past that tells us who we used to be and who we are today. Reminiscing is normal — for teenagers looking back with embarrassment on childhood memories or older adults reflecting on their past. Because reminiscing helps us learn, it also helps us adapt to change.

And reminiscing can also be a useful tool in helping us develop genealogies by drawing meaningful stories from our family members.

The Value of Reminiscing
Reminiscing can be an especially useful activity for those who are committed to collecting and preserving family stories. Reminiscing serves a number of important purposes:

1. It promotes understanding and connection among individuals and families.
2. It helps us preserve history.
3. It helps us understand our past and create significance for our present and future.

Reflecting can even help us cope with change and adapt to new environments. And when we do it collaboratively, it helps create community and broaden our understanding.

9 Tips for Reminiscing
So how can you start?

First of all, reminiscing is often successful as a group activity of five or six people. If you choose a group setting, be sure

• the room is quiet.
• everyone has equal opportunity to contribute.
• to provide objects or props to stimulate conversation.
• participants are instructed to be comfortable with pauses and silences.
• someone is assigned to record shared memories.
• confidentiality is honored.

The following tips provide a general starting place for reminiscing with elderly:

1. Ask open-ended questions that help the person remember their stories and experiences. Use photos, historical photography books, objects, or mementos to stir memories.
2. If possible, ask others to join you who may have shared the memories or similar memories during that era. Shared experiences often help others remember their own memories.
3. Ask questions that center around the person’s areas of interest and life experiences. Not all memories will be pleasant. Be sensitive to the emotional context of what is being shared and provide encouragement and reassurance. Respect the individual’s right to privacy and need for confidentiality.
4. Break down your questions into particular areas of interest: How did your family member say goodbye to loved ones during the war? What do they remember about seeing their family for the first time when they came home? Where did that take place? Where were they when they first heard the war was over? How did they feel?
5. Record what you learn and use that book, timeline, recording, video, etc. to stimulate future sessions.
6. Show an interest in your loved one’s shared memories. Body language, eye contact, and verbal affirmations indicate that we connect with the individual sharing their story and their experience.
7. Make reflective comments and ask meaningful and appropriate questions.
8. Empathize sensitively, especially if your loved one relates painful emotions.
9. Respond positively to both verbal and non-verbal attempts to communicate.

Reminiscing can help family members connect cross-generationally as you explore common threads of your shared stories. No matter where you may be in your exploration of ancestry, reminiscing can provide keys to growth within your family and your community.

Shelly Beach, MRE, is an expert on Caring.com, the leading online destination for caregivers seeking information and support as they care for aging parents, spouses, and other loved ones. Shelly answers family caregivers’ questions about spirituality and the Christian faith. She’s also the author of Precious Lord, Take My Hand: Meditations for Caregivers; Ambushed by Grace: Help and Hope on the Caregiving Journey; and It Is Well with My Soul: Meditations for Those Living with Illness, Pain, and the Challenges of Aging. For more information about spending time with older adults, see 11 Tips for a Terrific Visit With an Elderly Loved One.

Contributed by Shelly Beach
Caring.com Expert

We are bringing the Ancestry.co.uk Academy to you LIVE this year in a full live stream from The Olympia Exhibition Center in downtown London. Watch the live stream here below:

See the Academy Schedule for the weekend below (times shown are in GMT):

Academy Schedule

Ancestry.com: Las Vegas – The Marriage Capital of the World – An infographic by the team at Ancestry.com: Las Vegas Weddings

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Ancestry.com: Las Vegas – The Marriage Capital of the World – An infographic by the team at Ancestry.com: Las Vegas Weddings

What Does RootsTech Offer?

In addition to over 250 informative classes and hands-on workshops available for those from beginner to expert levels, RootsTech offers a number of fun, family history related activities:

• Scan an old book or documents
• Record a favorite family story
• Print a large format copy of your family tree
• Learn how to create a blog
• Discover ways to organize and share our photos

Just Getting Started?

New for 2013, RootsTech has a special Getting Started track designed especially for those who are just beginning their family history journey. Partner a Getting Started pass with Story@Home and discover the art of storytelling in order to preserve and share your family stories.

Register NOW and take advantage of limited time early bird pricing!

Registration Options

Full Three Day Pass - $149 (Early Bird)
Access to everything RootsTech has to offer.

One Day Only Pass – $89
Full admission for just one day.

Student Three Day Pass – $39
Student ID required.

NEW! Story@Home+Getting Started Combo Pass – $79
Access to all the Story@Home and Getting Started classes, all three days of RootsTech

Getting Started 3-day Pass - $39 (Early Bird)
Beginner track with access to over 30 classes.

Getting Started One Day Only Pass – $19
A selection of fundamental classes to help you get started.

• http://www.rootstech.org/schedule/sessions/?cid=RTAnctry_FEBemail
• http://www.rootstech.org/gettingstarted/?cid=RTAncstry_GS_Feb
• http://www.rootstech.org/stories/?cid=RTAnctry_Story_Feb
• http://www.rootstech.org/register/?cid=RTAnctry_FebReg

Becoming a community member is fast, easy and free. We’ve also created a point system to challenge and reward loyal members who actively volunteer their time and knowledge to help others get the most out of their family history research.

To sign up, navigate to Online Help and look for the “Ask the Community” button. Once on the Support Community homepage, look for the Sign Up | Sign In link in the upper right-hand corner of the Community homepage.

The Midwest Genealogy Center is one of the nation’s preeminent resources for family history, providing access to almost 750,000 on-site materials. Part of the Mid-Continent Public Library located in the Kansas City area, MGC features 52,000 square feet of space to house all the resources and technology genealogist need to research.

Ancestry Day will offer you a look at the best techniques for searching Ancestry.com and Ancestry Library Edition. You can connect with experts and other genealogy enthusiasts to help you in your research and inspire you to discover your history. Ancestry employees Lou Szucs, Anne Mitchell, and Cris Cooper will be available at the day-long workshop to help you get started or accelerate your efforts to find, organize, preserve, and share your family’s connections and history.

The genealogy excitement is not limited to this one day event. The staff of the Midwest Genealogy Center will be offering additional classes at their Independence location on Thursday, Friday, and Sunday of that weekend.  MGC will be open for research, as well, during normal business hours.  An added bonus to Ancestry Day registrants is a free reception at the Midwest Genealogy Center on Friday evening, allowing you the opportunity to meet Anne and Lou before the event.

Registration will open on January 2. Cost for the Ancestry Day event is $30 in advance and $35 at the door. The classes and research at the Midwest Genealogy Center are free.

Ancestry Day 2013 has something for everyone, whether you are an avid genealogist, just getting started, or simply want to connect with other genealogists. At Ancestry Day, come prepared to experience world-class content from Anne Mitchell and Lou Szucs.

Register Now Right Here! 

Worried about how to keep a conversation moving along when visiting an older adult in a nursing home or assisted living? Sometimes it’s helpful to focus not on what you should say but on *how to encourage stories* instead.

Storytelling can be a wonderful, no-pressure way to spend warm time together. People with memory or hearing trouble will feel less social pressure. Best of all, you just might learn some never-heard-before tales and tidbits about your relative or your family history.

Some ideas for seamless storytelling:

Consider bringing mementos as starting points. Ask for help with photo albums, a family tree, or an old marriage certificate, for example. Say, “I’ve been wondering about . . . ” “I need your help figuring out . . . ”

Make it easy, not like a test. Avoid peppering your loved one with detail-focused questions (“Who’s that? Where was this? Do you remember?”), especially if memory loss is a problem. Better: “Is this Aunt Jane? She’s so tall!” “Did you like growing up on a farm?”

If your loved one blanks or resists broad questions, go more narrow. Instead of asking, “What was it like in the war?” you might ask, “Were you nervous traveling overseas for the first time when you enlisted?” “Did you ever think we’d join the war?”

Ask about superlatives: “Who was your first boyfriend?” “What’s the longest you ever wore your hair?” “What’s the fastest car you ever drove?” “Did you have a favorite birthday?”

Remember these three little words: “Tell me about . . . “Often the best way to get someone talking isn’t by direct questioning. “Tell me about . . . ” invites stories in a nonthreatening, non-quiz-like way.

For people with dementia, try encouraging free-associated stories. Reminiscence therapy encourages creativity and stories with the pressure of “getting it right” removed. Look at photos in magazines, on postcards, or in picture books together. Ask open-ended questions that encourage a story, such as, “Why do think she’s wearing a dress like that?” “Did you ever have a dog like this one?”

For more ideas about how to spend time with an elderly loved one, see 11 Tips for a Terrific Visit

Paula Spencer Scott is senior editor at Caring.com, the leading online destination for caregivers seeking information and support as they care for aging parents, spouses, and other loved ones.  Paula is a 2011 Met Life Foundation Journalists in Aging fellow and writes extensively about health and caregiving.

As a book chronicling the history of the Academy was being researched, the stories of these of these individuals began to come to light. From Edward Drinker Cope and the infamous “Bone Wars” of the 1880s (the earliest days of paleontology that saw scholars fiercely competing with one another to find the most dinosaur fossils), to the creation of the Academy as a modern museum in the 1930s, to Ruth Patrick’s modern-day breakthroughs in environmental sciences, the movers and shakers of the Academy’s history were brought into the limelight.

After publication of the Academy’s history, entitled A Glorious Enterprise, we began to think about bringing together the descendents of the many people who have shaped the Academy… the Academy Family Reunion was born!  Some “family” members are actively involved with the Academy, but most have completely lost touch with us. We set about contacting the families we know, but are still looking to reconnect with others. At the event, Academy historian Robert Peck, co-author of the book, will share anecdotes with guests, the stories of their family members.

The enthusiasm from guests has been tremendous! Responses have steadily rolled in, often accompanied with comments of “I can’t wait for such an exciting evening!”, and everyone seems thrilled to have their own ancestors being recognized and honored for their roles in shaping the 200-year history of this incredible place. It is our hope that this family reunion becomes start of a new tradition. We would love for it to grow each year, as more descendents of the Academy’s legendary founders join us to shape the next 200 years of history together.

Are you descended from any science-inclined Philadelphians (science, medicine, plants, animals, etc.)? If so, you are probably connected to the Academy in some way, and we would love to hear from you. Your genealogy research could be helpful to us, and we have many stories to share. Please contact the museum at friends@ansp.org to learn more!

If Prince William and Kate Middleton decide to take baby-name inspiration from their forebears, the royal baby could be born a ‘Grissel’, ‘Boniface’ or even ‘Lancelot’. New research from Ancestry.com, the world’s largest online family history resource, reveals that while ‘Elizabeth’ and ‘John’ are the most common boys and girls names in both family trees, there are several more unusual choices the young royals could opt for.

The royal family tree contains some most unusual names – with Boniface, Cyrian, Marmaduke, Slyvanus and Lancelot featured in the male line; while Eusebia, Honor, Thomasin, Ursula and Hyacinth appear for the females.

While much of Kate’s family tree is populated with more recognizable names, a few of her ancestors boasted interesting monikers of their own. Among the boys there is Garin, Lewen, Theophilus, Uriah and Elie, along with girls named Permelia, Albina, Edezer, Grissel and Jemima.

“In today’s celebrity culture filled with unique baby names, Kate and William may not need to look further than their own family tree for inspiration,” said Michelle Ercanbrack, Family Historian for Ancestry.com. “With ‘Marmaduke’, ‘Lancelot, and ‘Permelia’ among their ancestors, they could undoubtedly start an interesting new trend in 2013.” 

Interesting names aren’t just for those with royal blood.

What name do you think Prince William and Kate should choose?